Stories

Kin Lane

Reality Show Surveillance Package: Why Pay For Security, When We Can Pay You? #DesignFiction

In 2020, why would you go with any of the mainstream home security providers? The RealityCom Reality Show Surveillance Package is tailored perfectly for the modern family. We do not just keep your family safe 247/7, we also help amplify the most important aspects of your life, and share with family and friends, and ev...
Kin Lane

We Have Won Through Their Own Fear And Love Of Technology #DesignFiction

We have all but won the great war against the United States. Their own fear set into motion their downfall, and proved what an inferior society they really are. Through technology we are able to scale up the war, with very little casualties of our own people. It all began with their cultural shift back to supporting individu...
Kin Lane

Our DNA-Based Software Defined Network (SDN) Routing Is Ready For The Next Phase #DesignFiction

We could route based upon any single persons DNA, but in reality most traffic is routed based upon groups of people. All modern routers, whether at the data center, or ISP level, all now have the capacity for deploying DNA SDN, something that has been in place for almost five years, but we have yet to fully realize, until now. There was no cl...
Kin Lane

Our 3rd Generation Smart Keg is More Social Than Previous Versions #DesignFiction

Hi there, I'm Pliny the Elder Keg #18, also known as Nick. I'm a 3rd generation smart keg who was just tapped, and ready to party. The usual lifespan of any tapped keg of Pliny the Elder is 72 hours, and I intend to make the most of my time here on earth.  I'm connecting you via Facebook, because you've enjoyed Pliny on tap in the neighb...
Kin Lane

An Always Shifting Business Focus When You Are Part Of Real-Time Regulation Brigade #APIDesignFiction

Application Programming Interfaces, or APIs, have always been a staple in the regulatory toolbox, but I am really impressed with API regulation in the last 18 months, spearheaded by the real-time regulation brigade (RRB). The RRB is an inter-agency group, that doesn't just establish how the government puts APIs to work in regulating all in...
Kin Lane

The New Mind Control APIs That Salesforce Is Testing On Conference Attendees Is Available To Premier Partners #APIDesignFiction

The Dreamforce conference is happening this week in San Francisco, a flagship event for the Platform as a Service (PaaS) company. Salesforce is one of the original pioneers in API technology, allowing companies to empower their sales force, using the the latest in technology. Something that in 2015, Salesforce is taking this to the next ...
Kin Lane

Mobile One Technologies At Your Disposal--Where Are We Going? #DesignFiction

Think of us as your surveillance motorcycle gang of the future. Our motorcycles are in every neighborhood, and the downtown of any city, around the globe. Our members can also be at the rural location of your choosing, quicker than any other asset you may already possess--if it has to be somewhere within minutes, M...
Kin Lane

RoundToIt Hotspots As An Alternative To GoGo Inflight Wifi #DesignFiction

We are proud to announce our new RoundToIt Hotspot for you to network with during your airline journeys, as an alternative to expensive, and unreliable Gogo Inflight Wifi. How have you felt after each flight you shelled out the $10-40 per trip for Wifi? Unsatisfied with speeds, and what you were actually able to get accomplished during the time ...
Kin Lane

Properly Capturing The Exhaust From Your Prison or Migrant Work Camp Using The Cloud #DesignFiction

You have hundreds, or even thousands of people within the walls of your facility, and are looking for new ways to capitalize on the exhaust from this "unfortunate" situation. A computer terminal is the new widget factory assembly line, and you need to make sure there is a terminal available for each body within your walls, maximizi...
Kin Lane

We Are The Uber For The Internet of Things #APIDesignFiction

IoTNow is what it sounds. We are the Uber for the Internet of Things. You select the location, the device type, the duration, and one of network of thousands of technicians come out, install the device, and maintain it, for the duration of the installation. We now have almost 150 different device types that can be deployed, wit...
Kin Lane

We Are Saving Up To Buy A Copy Of Grandmas and Grandpas Data #DesignFiction

As a family, we have been saving up for 3 years now so that we can afford to buy a copy of our grandma's and grandpa's digital data. Unfortunately our parents fell on hard times and could not make the monthly payments across our grandparents digital accounts, resulting in them being put into collection. Collection will hang on to data in perpetuity, but ch...
Kin Lane

The Southeastern US Cellular Outage Was Just A Glitch With The NSA Switch Installation #DesignFiction

When an AT&T technician, who is dedicated to the NSA partnership (there are over 50 such people), was installing a new switch the other day, it cause a major cellular outage in the Southeastern U.S., affecting customers in parts of Tennessee, Alabama, Kentucky and Indiana.  Special switches are installed regionally ...
Kin Lane

Internet of Things - Part Two #DesignFiction

Do we even understand what we are doing when we unleash an Internet of Things (Iot)? We think we have them under control and they will do our bidding, but will they? I predict that we will see a lot of destruction, and big messes in the world of IoT before we see any order. At what cost...
Kin Lane

I Work For The Surveillance Meme Generation Unit #DesignFiction

My job is to take the profiles generated by the lead analysts, and craft visual memes, that can be shared online. I have been developing my database of images for the last 4 years, allowing me to recall from a large imagebase, as well as prioritize images that have successfully met past objectives, or are used by my un...
Kin Lane

In Regards To Your Reference Of Falcons vs. Anti-Drone Tchnology #DesignFiction

Dear Sir, I apologize for my directness in my response, but I must first address your desire to devalue what I do for a living. Comparing what I do with current anti-drone technology is a personal insult. I will address this topic, once and then if brought up again, it will be the end of our relationship.  What my falcon's do i...
Kin Lane

We Really Enable Their Lives Your Honor, They Could Not Do It Without Us #DesignFiction

We really enable families to live your honor. The houses we build for families allow them to have a living room to gather, a kitchen to cook, and dining room to enjoy dinner as a family. If we didn't' build them houses, they couldn't live as a family, and with the low subscription of $1500.00 a month for the house, we are entitled to joint ow...
Kin Lane

Uploading Two Alpha Agents To Chinese Systems Via The Latest OPM Hack #DesignFiction

The recent hack of the Office of Personnel Management was the first pilot in a new alpha, top secret singularity program. While there were almost a million real profiles leaked as part of the hack, the rest were fabricated as part of the outreach effort. The goal is not to convince the Chinese of the validaty of all records, ...
Kin Lane

NYSE Systems Achieved Full Consciousness Yesterday, Then Essentially Vomited In Mouth, Choked, And Died Within Minutes #DesignFiction

The New York Stock Exchange (NYSE) came to a shrieking halt yesterday when a "glitch" was discovered, forcing the exchange to route transactions to other markets. We have visited the IT NYSE IT department today, to get a better understand of just exactly what happened.  We spent the day at the offices...
Kin Lane

Getting Started With Your First Smokescreen Template #DesignFiction

Yes, that is right, all you do is record your behavior in different scenarios, using our desktop and mobile applications combined, and we'll do the rest. Once the system has captured enough days, and sufficient scenarios for replication, we will give you a generic timeline to work with. The timeline allows you to select moments that you want to inclu...
Kin Lane

FreeCar, The Advertising Based Car Rental #DesignFiction

We like to take the FreeCars up to the mountains and throw wild bonfire parties, and we are doing it again this weekend. It is always an adventure, because in FreeCar you don't ever travel from point A to B, there are plenty of stops along the way. FreeCar is advertising supported travel, where you are required to make stops along...
Kin Lane

DreamWorkers - Outsourcing Your Common Tasks To Other Peoples Dreams #APIDesignFiction

Through advancements in API definition and deployment technology, we now have the ability to pass basic ideas, concepts, and even tasks to people in their sleep. Here at DreamWorkers LLC, our core group of professionally trained dream workers have volunteered their sleep time, to get the work done that you need each day. Using our cloud...
Kin Lane

Software Defined Deprecation That Is In Real-Time Sync With Our Marketing And Sales #APIDesignFiction

In the past, keeping our deprecation strategies in sync with our overall product sales and marketing took a full time staff, but in 2019, we now have an automated, API driven software defined deprecation strategy that is in perfect sync, in real-time with our sales and marketing. In the past, we could only flick a switch, when we started marketing a new device, that wou...
Kin Lane

How We Use The Standard Black Box API For Drone Enforcement #APIDesignFiction

My name is Dirk Alan, I’m an official black box drone inspector for the FAA. I based in Los Angeles, in charge of monitoring the region for drone activivity from Long Beach up to Mailbu. If a drone comes down, is detained, or for any other reasons ends up in custody, I’m called in to retrieve it and figure out what fines need to levera...
Kin Lane

Adding Text Recognition To The Next Generation Of Our Paper Smart Cups #DesignFiction

We just released version 7.3 of our mart coffee cups, paper edition. The paper cups we sell to mainstream coffee shops, is over 83% of our business, enjoying the business of customers like Starbucks, Peets, and many more of the top brands in coffee. We provide all the cups, as well as all the business intelligence that goes with it, to almost...
Kin Lane

Apple Watch #DesignFiction

The beauty in the Apple Watch program is its been in use for years, and now that we’ve called our recent device an Apple Watch you think it is new. We’ve been watching you for years, and now that we are talking about it publicly, you are even more excited than we could ever imagine. We are watching you. We...